When people offend you, do you distance yourself from them? …liar. All of us have withdrawn from a relationship or to because the other person had a different way about them. You know the analogy? iron sharpens iron as one man takes offense to another. I see this on a daily basis in our homeless mission. When a young adults enroll themselves in In Triumph for help, they eventually get challenged by our biblical world view and principles, so to protect their “reality”, they take up an offense against our direction and become the victim. If we accommodate their feelings and shrink back, they gain control and ruin any chance of healing.
We camouflage our “control issues” so well that I truly believe most people do not recognize this deep sin within them. A nice thick coat of “offense” is painted over this ugly beast of control and instantly we are transformed into a sweet little harmless victim. And everybody feels sorry for the victim. It’s brilliant. If we do not like someone’s opinion, or our feelings get hurt in the mix, we will take advantage of the other person’s empathy to manipulate the outcome, or if that does not work, we will make them out to be the bad guy so we can build a team of supporters in our favor. You have done it, I have done it and it is just plain wicked.
What we need to understand is that offense is not the issue, the issue is always control. When we get offended, it is not because of what someone said or did, it is because they are unlike us and we can not manipulate them. If we strike at the heart of this monster, we would see that we are happiest when the people around us are made in our own likeness, after our own image. Have you become a demigod that has created a universe where everyone thinks and acts just like you? …liar. Not everyone is Baptist, Republican and politically correct in their actions.
We all know that when Christ was on the cross he asked the Father to forgive his enemies. But I want us to stop and realize something bigger. Christ did not just forgive his enemies, Christ carried absolutely no offense in his heart whatsoever. So in this blog I am not just addressing forgiveness, I am addressing total forgiveness. To love your brother enough to never allow his actions to offend you. Unconditional grace.
Remembering Proverbs 27:5-6
“Better is open rebuke
than hidden love.
Faithful are the wounds of a friend;
profuse are the kisses of an enemy.”
In Christ & In Triumph,
Pete Orta
teaching pastor at in triumph
